durham radio inc.

Dear driving populace of the greater Los Angeles metropolitan area,

Do the citizens of Gotham wait until Batman has arrived to shine their Bat Signal into the sky, as if to celebrate his saving their lives? No. That would be foolish. They shine their Bat Signal into the sky to signal that they need him to come save their lives. If they didnapos;t shine their Bat Signal into the sky, heapos;d have no idea that they needed him, and heapos;d sit around his bat cave eating pie or playing Scrabble with Robin or whatever it is that Batman does on his days off.

Now. Using this same logic, can anyone tell me when we should use our turn signals? Anyone? Hands please? No? Right. We use our turn signals to signal that we want to change lanes or make a turn. We do not use our turn signals to indicate that we are currently changing lanes, nor do we use our turn signals to indicate that we have succeeded in changing lanes. This is like the people of Gotham turning on the Bat Signal after Batman has the Joker in a headlock. It makes no sense. This failure to use common sense when dealing with turning signals is why my life flashes before my eyes every morning, and why you spend so much of your morning flipping people off and screaming in your car.

(Also, it should be noted that some people actually do use their turn signals as intended. We do this so that you will see that we plan to change lanes, and therefore prevent you from moving into our intended lane as we are moving into it. The basic idea is as follows: I see a space in the lane next to me that I wish to occupy. I turn on my turn signal. I look behind me and in front of me to make sure no one else has their turn signal on. If so, I let them in first. If not, I get into the lane. If someone who didnapos;t have their turn signal on barges into the lane without noticing that I had my turn signal on, I smite them. Itapos;s not a difficult system, and I believe that if we all work together on this, we can stop killing each other. At least on the freeway accidentally.)

Yours,
Michelle

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